King Danny the Diminutive

Once upon a time, not so long ago in the kingdom of Morton Grove there were two public houses.

Once upon a time

One house, the Studio was known for fine food and drink while the other, Maxwell’s was more suited to the common citizen. Maxwell’s was known as a public house where many of the older serfs could get a decent meal for few dollars and this pleased the populace.

It came to pass that during the reign of King Daniel the Frail these public houses were placed into a District of TIF because the advisors to King Daniel the Frail convinced the King that this would modernize and improve the kingdom without asking the serfs for more taxes. Since it was well known that serfs hated paying taxes to the Royal Treasury King Daniel the frail decided this was a good thing. old king

As time went by, the people became restless with King Daniel the frail, and replaced him with Prince Richard the slick, who was a vassal of King Calvin the Connected.

Prince Richard the Slick promised the people many good things. evil king

He promised better services; he promised lower taxes; he promised open government, but his promises were empty. He did not remove the hated tax of the refuse; he and his varlets increased the taxes on the serfs’ hovels by 28%. It seemed as if all of the bad things the serfs had complained about under King Daniel the Frail were compounded twofold under Prince Richard the Slick.

In time, a real estate speculation guild purchased the land upon which the public houses stood. They petitioned Prince Richard the Slick to tear down the public houses and replace them with luxury hovels for the serfs. The guild assured the prince that they would not require any money from the public treasury to perform this miracle; and that by building these luxury hovels they would increase the taxes paid into the prince’s treasury without taking any more taxes from the current serfs. The varlets advising Prince Richard the Slick thought this was a wonderful idea, since at least one member of the real estate speculation guild was experienced in assessing risks, and so they advised the Prince to go for it… which he did.

Much time went by and no hovels were built. Plans were changed many times and still no hovels were built. Finally, the real estate speculation guild came to Prince Richard the Slick and said; “We need money out of the Royal treasury before we can build the luxury hovels for the serfs.”panic dollar

Prince Richard called for a hearing on the matter, which is a funny name for a meeting where neither the Prince nor his varlets listen to anything because they have already made up their minds beforehand.

Eventually the people once again became restless with Prince Richard the Slick and replaced him with Count Daniel the Fair. Count Daniel the fair was, well, bland.

good king He did not give rousing speeches. He did not make grandiose promises, but quietly plodded along working to try to undo the damage that had been done to the realm by Prince Richard the Slick. He eliminated the unnecessary positions at the palace that had been given to vassals of Richard the Slick, which made the vassals very unhappy. He cut the budget of the many departments in the palace and caused the knights and their pages to work hard, which caused grumbling amongst the knights and pages. Even though it was a time of recession and economic scarcity, his actions caused the kingdoms’ bond rating to rise. But after a time, because Count Daniel the Fair was seen as boring, some of the vassals who were still loyal to Prince Richard the Slick saw a way to remove Count Daniel the fair.

 

Firstly, they plied Vassal Danny the Short  DiMaria behind the curtain with flattery, telling him that he would make a much better king that Count Daniel the Fair.

They further courted the favor of Vassal Billy the Bufoon,  dwarf jestertelling him how smart he was and what a great prime
minister he would make to Vassal Danny the Short. The conspirators, known then as the Party of Caw Cuss, executed a coup de tat and Count Daniel the Fair was deposed and vassal Danny the Short was installed as King Danny the Diminutive.

dwarf prince

King Danny the Diminutive made sweeping promises of new businesses for the kingdom. Danny the Diminutive made flowery speeches and his picture was spread about the realm copiously. But, nothing got done. No new good new business came to the kingdom, (there were a few houses of questionable morality where lots were cast and dice were rolled electronically). pigs at the money trough

Money that was supposed to go into improvement in the kingdom was spent for hiring political consultants that once again, Danny the Diminutive promised great reward, and, once again, nothing happened. The streets of the realm were not fixed. The cost of water to the peasants hovels kept going up and up. pay-to-play

And yet, King Danny the Diminutive kept making promises that were empty. He had no road map to follow in governing the kingdom. He had no compass to show him the way.no compass

This on again off again approach is exactly how King Danny the Diminutive governs  Morton Grove. One minute he supports this and the next he supports that. The one finite mode of governing is King Danny the Diminutive’s Kingdom of Chicago style politics. If you not with him 100% then you are against him. He warns, “Don’t cross me or I will destroy you!”  He is 100%  in control of a out of control kingdom.

King Danny the Diminutive, in quiet moments, knows that he has not improved the lives of the peasants in the kingdom, but he also thinks like one of his royal heroes:

“Let them eat cake!”.   let them eat cake

The Firebug

Nero fiddles

Like Nero of Ancient Rome, Danny DiMaria is fiddling while Morton Grove is burning. He talks of big plans, plasters his name and face all over while Morton Grove disintegrates. You have to wonder if he is trying to distract us or himself.

We have a Village President who is mismatched, (or more realistically over-matched),regarding the problems facing the village and the taxpayers. It seems, like a little child fascinated by playing with matches,  little Danny can’t help but set fires to see the pretty flames… and his answer seems to be to call on the fire chief to put them out. littlest aronist

Burn down the successful senior program and then put the fire chief in charge to sift through the ashes after trying to extinguish the conflagration.

cartoon-fireman

Set a torch to the successful cost cutting at the Civic Center, once again, call on the trusty fire chief to stop the flames. playing-with-fire

The latest blaze set by pyro-Danny is to can the current Village Administrator who was unable to figure out how to deal with Danny D’s ongoing wienie-roast that had eaten up the financial surplus; increased the cost of government;  added unnecessary employees to the village payroll and further worsened the pension crisis Morton Grove faces. Burn it down

 

Little Pyro-Danny’s answer, once again, is to call in the fire chief to put out still more fires that have been set by the incompetence of the village president.

fighting fire

The fire chief, on the other hand, knows that the best way to fight fires is to prevent them from starting in the first place, rather than scramble from crisis to crisis trying to put out one bonfire after another. The fire chief knows that the solution to this municipal arson would be to take away Danny DiMaria’s box of matches and make sure he can’t get his hands on a lighter. fire prevention The fire chief knows this, but he also knows that he does not have the ability to do this since Danny “D” will have the political power to continue to set these fires for at least two more years that he’s in power.

It must be frustrating for the fire chief to know what needs to be done and to be powerless to do it.

Stress And Frustration

Beating a dead horse

beating-a-dead-horse

A recent news flash was sent out by the Village of Morton Grove last week informing those who need to know that; “Morton Grove Fire Chief Tom Friel in now the acting Village administer.”

The question is…WHY?

We can only assume that after  a tight midterm election, Village President Dan DiMaria is reacting to the sounds of  discontentment with his administration and lack of progress in addressing the real needs of the residents.

Mr. DiMaria came into office with Big Ideas & Promises. Now, two years later there is little or nothing to show and it appears that DiMaria might need a scape goat for his increases in spending and the increases of staff at village hall.

What happened to “Moving Our Village Forward”?

If you tally, point by point,  what has happened in Morton Grove since the DiMaria/Grear takeover of the Action Party you are hard pressed to find anything to be proud of.

*The Village bond rating went down;

JunkYardBond
*There was a complete dismantling of Family and Senior services;

scamming seniors
*The Emergency Management Agency has been effectively dismantled with only a couple of volunteers remaining;

Paul-Blart
* In Village Hall there are filling cabinets filled with consulting fees and plans that are going nowhere;

4a097-makeitrain-bmp
* There is an over 100% increase in staff in the building and economic development department with little or no increase in new development.

Move along

Changing the horse that  pulls the load you want carried is good, if the horse can’t pull, but Is changing the horse the answer in this case?

Don’t forget Mr. DiMaria was involved in selecting the last horse from the paddock.

Let’s look at the load this same replaced horse pulled with the previous driver of the wagon:

1. Completed 40 miles of repaving local streets

2. Brought McGrath Audi to Morton Grove (without an Economic Development Department)

3. Completed over 20 major badly overdue infrastructure improvements

4. Increased Village Bond rating

5. Reduced cost of Civic Center operation from $600,000 to under $200,000

Why is it that with Mr. DiMaria at the reins of the wagon, suddenly the horse can’t pull the load anymore.

Why is a reasonable question to ask.

Maybe the load currently being piled on the wagon is so heavy that no horse can pull it.

horse-drawn-carts

So Mr. DiMaria’s answer is to hook up a new horse that is already carrying  a big load with the weight of the Fire Department and the Civic Center. That sounds like the most likely outcome will be to destroy a useful and productive horse that has served the folks of Morton Grove well and faithfully for many years.

Is it possible that the problem is not the horse pulling the wagon but the Jackass holding the reins?

jackass

Perhaps if Mr. DiMaria is looking for the reason for the failures over the past two years, he needs to look in the mirror.